reading

Feb 02, 2016

The one thing you need to do to read more in 2016

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In these times of clickbait, Buzzfeed and mental devolution, it’s social media suicide to expect your followers to read through anything more challenging than a list of 10.  Ain’t nobody got time for that. There is no place for full sentences or coherence when you’re competing with  ‘17Birds who are complete assholes‘.

Well, we’re going to do you one better. eReads proudly presents, not the 10 things, not the 5 things, but the ONE thing you need to do to read more in 2016:

Realise that reading is not optional.

 Now bear with me, Buzzfeed is not going anywhere. Think about it: The majority of functioning humans take the time each morning to cleanse and preen. We shower, we brush our teeth. We wear something pretty. More than half of us take an additional 30 minutes to lather our faces with various pastes and coax our hair into submission. We consider this ritual of making ourselves presentable to the outside world as imperative. A brave few go even further and drag themselves to some sort of gymnasium, where, I’m told, a lot of healthy things happen. We sacrifice this precious morning time because we have to. To stagger into work wearing pajamas and reeking of yesterday’s sins is not an option.

Now think of reading as a mind shower. Consider that your mind is just as dishevelled as your body. It is slow and uninteresting. It is most likely clogged with an abundance of useless information, including but not limited to Rihanna lyrics, photos of your friends’ food, and an intimate knowledge of celebrities’ personal lives.  This makes you a boring person. You need to take action every single day to preen your mind, just as you do your body.

Because believe me, nobody wants to hear about what you saw on Facebook this morning. They don’t care which Disney princess you are or which procedural cop show you’re currently binge watching. They want to know about Hemingway and the American dream. They want to be inspired and showered with Wildean wit.  Even if they don’t realise it, they need to hear that Derrida is not a type of fish.

‘I don’t get time to read’ is not a thing. You don’t subject others to your dirty, unkempt body. Show yourself and those who share your air the same courtesy by taking a daily brain shower. Invest the time to cultivate a personality.

But first, go read that post about the birds. They really are unbelievable assholes.

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